At a loss

I feel like someone died. I didn't nurse Dana today. I had to take an imitrex at 3 so when it was time to go to bed, I could only read to her. To make matters worse, she was overtired and cried. Which of course made me cry. I bought her a stroller and doll today. The doll came with a bottle. I showed Dana how to feed the baby and she did it...and well. How ironic that on the day I wean my baby, Dana learned how to feed hers. I know I can turn around and nurse her tomorrow night, and I might, but if I start on that rollercoaster, I might never get off.

I miss her. And she's not gone. It's the baby that I miss. Now I have a little girl. Who is so precious. That smile means so much to me. Everytime she says "mommy," my heart melts.

I can't stop crying. I'm just hoping this will get easier as the days go by.